Gift list

Traditionally, a gift list existed to help couples set-up-home together. Typically it included china, glass, linens and kitchenware. The bride's mother managed the list, sending-out relevant information on request. Nowadays most newlyweds will already have homes of their own (not necessarily together) and will have accumulated the households basics. Thus today's gift lists are more 'wish lists' ensuring you receive at least some of the items you want or need.

Today most high street storeshave gift registry services where guests can browse and shop on-line. Specialist wedding list shops also exist around the country. A gift list avoids duplication of presents and most companies will allow you to change you r mind and exchange items before they are delivered.

Gift list services usually take only a limited number of clients and work on a first-come-first-served basis. Before registering with a company or store, check you are being offered an expert opinion as you shop. Do they offer a personal, face-to-face service? Are sales staff on hand to advise both you and your guests? Can you see products on-line? Three or four months before the wedding, allow at least half a day to draw up the list in-store so that it is up-and-running before you send your invitations. Once opened, you'll be updated weekly about the progress of the list, know who has given you what, and be able to alter and add items if necessary. Guests wil be able to buy in-store, over the phone and on-line. More registry services deliver free of charge either as gifts are purchased or all at once when the list has been closed. Guests who prefer to give your present in person will be able to take delivery themselves upon purchase.

The most successful lists are those where everything is purchased and include a variety of items that suit all budgets. But with the larger department stores offering a choice of many thousands of products, where do you start? Therefore, have a really good look at what you've already got between you and come with an idea of what you think you need. Start with the basics: crockery, kitchenware, linens and household items. Inclue some hobby gifts, perhaps a BBQ and garden furniture. You might also want a second dinner service or something special.

It was traditionally frowned-upon to mention gifts in an invitation, but most couples now consider it acceptable to mail gift list details with their invitations. If you decide to do this, include details discreetly. Perhaps at the bottom of an accomodation list or with directions.Record all the gifts on your 'Guest Spreadsheet' as they arrive. Don't expect all your guests to purchase from your list, and accept all gifts graciously, writing a thank-you note as you receive them. Alternatively wait and send a card with a photograph from the wedding when you return from your honeymoon. Arrange a secure area at the reception for gifts brought on the day, and assign siomeone (usually the best man) to deliver them to your home.